How to Ruin Your Influence

Luke 14:34-35

2000007

Subject: Influence; service

Introduction

A. Your reputation, your influence is important and valuable. The scriptures teach how your influence is more valuable than precious ointment or even great wealth.

1. Eccl. 7:1

2. Prov. 22:1

B. Christ taught his disciples that their influence upon those around them, upon the world was of tremendous importance. Lk. 14:34-35

C. How much thought do you give to your influence?

1. It needs to be considered daily.

2. as we go to work, drive, interact with family, purchase goods from the grocery, EVERYTHING.

3. Just a few seconds of thoughtlessness can permanently damage our influence w/someone outside of Christ.

a) slip of the tongue

b) outburst of anger

c) who we associate with

D. There are any number of ways that we can lose our savor, hide our light or ruin our reputation and influence.

E. Let’s discuss them this AM.

I. By Being Inconsistent

A. If your words are inconsistent with your deeds people will notice.

1. There have been those who have sorely disappointed me with their inconsistency in how they apply one set of rules to themselves and their friends and another to their foes.

2. Prov. 26:7

3. Such inconsistency and hypocrisy has caused me not to listen to what they say or read what they write. Why? How can I follow or listen to advise from someone who is so inconsistent.

4. If I act the same way, I will diminish my influence.

B. To ruin your good influence and turn another away from your profession, just be inconsistent in your life and example.

1. Eccl. 10:1

2. A person who is supposed to be wise and honorable who goes out and acts like a fool, turns his influence from valuable ointment into stinking mess of dead flies.

C. The world is always trying to catch those who profess to be Christians in inconsistency.

1. This is why those in the world ridicule and mock those who profess religion and yet get caught in corruption and immorality.

2. Like Jim and Tammy Baker and like Jimmy Swaggart.

D. God warns us against the gross immorality and hypocrisy of inconsistently saying one thing and doing another.

1. Rom. 2:21

2. Look at your life. Are you inconsistent? Are you saying one thing and doing another?

3. Are others noticing this inconsistency? Have you turned someone away from the Lord?

II. By Being Unreliable

A. To ruin a good influence, just be unreliable.

1. Don't be dependable. When others give you a task or a job to do, don't always do what you are asked or told or expected to do.

2. Don't be responsible. Don't ever do your duty regularly, but intermittently so no one knows whether you will or won't do what you are supposed to do.

a) And never ever volunteer or choose to go beyond your duty.

b) If you do volunteer, be sure not to do what you volunteered to do.

3. Don't be trustworthy. Don't do what you say you are going to do. When you make a promise or offer to do something, don't be hurried,…

a) don't be timely, don't be concerned and if something else comes up or sidetracks you or distracts you….

b) simply ignore and conveniently forget what you promised to do.

4. Would you hire a person with such an attitude?

a) Would you marry such a person?

b) Would you be influenced by such a person?

c) Certainly not! You would look at such an undependable, irresponsible, untrustworthy, unreliable person and recognize that they don't even have their own life working right, how can or should they influence you?

B. How do people respond to one who is unreliable?

1. They don't trust them.

2. They don't listen to them.

3. They don't ask them to do a job.

4. They don't give them responsibility.

5. They don't depend on them to what they say.

6. They are not influenced by them.

C. The Bible warns about trusting on those who are unreliable.

1. 2 Ki. 18:21

2. God describes the unreliable as a splintered staff or walking stick one leans upon for support and it breaks and runs through the hand of the one who leans upon it.

3. Consider Prov. 25:19.

D. Paul's experience with people who were unreliable.

1. Paul's experience with Mark when Mark quit the journey and turned back caused Paul to consider Mark unreliable.

a) Acts 15:38

b) Mark had to reprove himself to Paul that he was dependable and could be relied upon when the going got tough.

2. 2 Tim. 4:16 - Those who forsook him at his defense:

3. Demas--"For Demas hath forsaken me, having loved this present world" (2 Tim. 4:10).

4. Are you unreliable to your friends, your family, fellow Christians, the Lord?

III. Being Unfriendly

A. Those who are friendly have a tremendous influence on those around them.

1. Lk. 11:5-8

2. Long ago, the writer of Proverbs said, "A man who has friends must himself be friendly " Proverbs 18:24

3. The principle holds true throughout the generations.

a) Those who act in a friendly manner will receive, in like manner, the reaction of friendship.

b) It is when a person acts in an unfriendly way that their life is lonely and without friends.

B. One of the quickest ways to lose influence, to lose your savor, to hide your light is to be unfriendly.

1. We don't want to be around those who are unfriendly, how can they influence us for good?

2. I am unfriendly if I respond meanly and abruptly in response to the unfriendliness of another.

a) If I react to someone's vulgarity and crudeness, I'm playing their game.

b) I'm dancing on the end of their string. I've allowed their problems to become my problems.

c) But if I respond to their vulgarity and crudeness with graciousness and kindness, it is still their problem. I don't want to let them decide how I'm going to live.

d) Who's running your life? Anyone you react to.

3. We can be unfriendly when we don't care. The most unfriendly words in any language are the words, "I don't care." They express apathy instead of empathy.

C. God's Word teaches us to be friendly and influence those around us for good.

1. Prov. 18:24

2. Prov. 17:17

3. Isn't being friendly one of the ways " the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts " (Rom. 5:5)

IV. Be Quick Tempered.

A. The Bible warns us not to be quick tempered nor be friends with one who has a quick temper.

1. Eccl. 7:9

2. Prov. 22:24

B. Why?

1. Prov. 14:17

2. Prov. 14:29

D. Those who are quickly angry, quickly lose their ability to affect and influence others for good.

1. No one wants to be around someone who easily "flies off the handle." Their afraid they might get hit, hurt or blamed.

2. Prov. 15:1

3. A member of Lincoln's cabinet who frequently disagreed with him about his policies was Secretary Stanton, a man of very pronounced views. One day President Lincoln sent a message of state to Secretary Stanton by a page. On reading the message Stanton using violent language tore up the message and declared, "President Lincoln is a fool!" Returning to the President the page reported what Stanton had said. Instead of becoming angry, the President, after a moment's thought, said with a grin, "Well, perhaps Secretary Stanton is right!" Because of his greatness of soul and soft answer, Lincoln completely unarmed the man who so frequently opposed him.

4. If no one wants to be around those who are soon angry then how can such a person ever influence others to be and do good?

V. Uncontrolled Tongue

A. Few things will destroy one's influence than a loose tongue

1. People consider a person who cannot control their tongue foolish.

2. Eccl. 5:3

3. Those with an uncontrolled tongue include:

a) Braggarts: - Prov. 27:2

b) Talebearers - Prov. 26:20-22

c) complainers - Jude 16

B. To be considered wise and spread righteous influence:

1. Let your words be few. - Prov. 10:19-20

2. Let your words be well chosen - Prov. 15:28

3. Let your words be spoken with grace - Col. 4:6

VI. Unwilling to Admit When Wrong

A. A person who won't admit when they are wrong will lose their influence.

1. Note what the Scriptures say: Prov. 12:15

2. A fired Northwestern University professor was arrested for collecting his mother's social security checks for 6 years after her death. He blamed "extreme procrastination behavior" caused by depression.

B. When you are wrong readily and willingly admit it and be done with it!

1. Prov. 14:16

Conclusion.

A. Is your lamp lit? "But the path of the just is as the shining light, that shines more and more unto the perfect day" (Prov. 4:18).

B. My Life

1. My life shall touch a dozen lives before this day is done; Leave countless marks for good or ill, ere sets the evening sun. This is the wish I always wish, the prayer I always pray: Lord, may my life help other lives it touches by the way. Source unknown

C. How’s your influence. Are you leading, pointing others toward Christ?

E. If you haven’t yet obeyed the gospel, you can do so today. You can begin to show a positive influence on others.

F. I N V I T A T I O N



How to Ruin Your Influence Luke 14:34-35 2000007 Subject: Influence; service Introduction A. Your reputation, your influence is important and valuable. The scriptures teach how your influence is more valuable than precious ointment or even great wealth. 1. Eccl. 7:1 2. Prov. 22:1 B. Christ taught his disciples that their influence upon those around them, upon the world was of tremendous importance. Lk. 14:34-35 C. How much thought do you give to your influence? 1. It needs to be considered daily. 2. as we go to work, drive, interact with family, purchase goods from the grocery, EVERYTHING. 3. Just a few seconds of thoughtlessness can permanently damage our influence w/someone outside of Christ. a) slip of the tongue b) outburst of anger c) who we associate with D. There are any number of ways that we can lose our savor, hide our light or ruin our reputation and influence. E. Let’s discuss them this AM. I. By Being Inconsistent A. If your words are inconsistent with your deeds people will notice. 1. There have been those who have sorely disappointed me with their inconsistency in how they apply one set of rules to themselves and their friends and another to their foes. 2. Prov. 26:7 3. Such inconsistency and hypocrisy has caused me not to listen to what they say or read what they write. Why? How can I follow or listen to advise from someone who is so inconsistent. 4. If I act the same way, I will diminish my influence. B. To ruin your good influence and turn another away from your profession, just be inconsistent in your life and example. 1. Eccl. 10:1 2. A person who is supposed to be wise and honorable who goes out and acts like a fool, turns his influence from valuable ointment into stinking mess of dead flies. C. The world is always trying to catch those who profess to be Christians in inconsistency. 1. This is why those in the world ridicule and mock those who profess religion and yet get caught in corruption and immorality. 2. Like Jim and Tammy Baker and like Jimmy Swaggart. D. God warns us against the gross immorality and hypocrisy of inconsistently saying one thing and doing another. 1. Rom. 2:21 2. Look at your life. Are you inconsistent? Are you saying one thing and doing another? 3. Are others noticing this inconsistency? Have you turned someone away from the Lord? II. By Being Unreliable A. To ruin a good influence, just be unreliable. 1. Don't be dependable. When others give you a task or a job to do, don't always do what you are asked or told or expected to do. 2. Don't be responsible. Don't ever do your duty regularly, but intermittently so no one knows whether you will or won't do what you are supposed to do. a) And never ever volunteer or choose to go beyond your duty. b) If you do volunteer, be sure not to do what you volunteered to do. 3. Don't be trustworthy. Don't do what you say you are going to do. When you make a promise or offer to do something, don't be hurried,… a) don't be timely, don't be concerned and if something else comes up or sidetracks you or distracts you…. b) simply ignore and conveniently forget what you promised to do. 4. Would you hire a person with such an attitude? a) Would you marry such a person? b) Would you be influenced by such a person? c) Certainly not! You would look at such an undependable, irresponsible, untrustworthy, unreliable person and recognize that they don't even have their own life working right, how can or should they influence you? B. How do people respond to one who is unreliable? 1. They don't trust them. 2. They don't listen to them. 3. They don't ask them to do a job. 4. They don't give them responsibility. 5. They don't depend on them to what they say. 6. They are not influenced by them. C. The Bible warns about trusting on those who are unreliable. 1. 2 Ki. 18:21 2. God describes the unreliable as a splintered staff or walking stick one leans upon for support and it breaks and runs through the hand of the one who leans upon it. 3. Consider Prov. 25:19. D. Paul's experience with people who were unreliable. 1. Paul's experience with Mark when Mark quit the journey and turned back caused Paul to consider Mark unreliable. a) Acts 15:38 b) Mark had to reprove himself to Paul that he was dependable and could be relied upon when the going got tough. 2. 2 Tim. 4:16 - Those who forsook him at his defense: 3. Demas--"For Demas hath forsaken me, having loved this present world" (2 Tim. 4:10). 4. Are you unreliable to your friends, your family, fellow Christians, the Lord? III. Being Unfriendly A. Those who are friendly have a tremendous influence on those around them. 1. Lk. 11:5-8 2. Long ago, the writer of Proverbs said, "A man who has friends must himself be friendly " Proverbs 18:24 3. The principle holds true throughout the generations. a) Those who act in a friendly manner will receive, in like manner, the reaction of friendship. b) It is when a person acts in an unfriendly way that their life is lonely and without friends. B. One of the quickest ways to lose influence, to lose your savor, to hide your light is to be unfriendly. 1. We don't want to be around those who are unfriendly, how can they influence us for good? 2. I am unfriendly if I respond meanly and abruptly in response to the unfriendliness of another. a) If I react to someone's vulgarity and crudeness, I'm playing their game. b) I'm dancing on the end of their string. I've allowed their problems to become my problems. c) But if I respond to their vulgarity and crudeness with graciousness and kindness, it is still their problem. I don't want to let them decide how I'm going to live. d) Who's running your life? Anyone you react to. 3. We can be unfriendly when we don't care. The most unfriendly words in any language are the words, "I don't care." They express apathy instead of empathy. C. God's Word teaches us to be friendly and influence those around us for good. 1. Prov. 18:24 2. Prov. 17:17 3. Isn't being friendly one of the ways " the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts " (Rom. 5:5) IV. Be Quick Tempered. A. The Bible warns us not to be quick tempered nor be friends with one who has a quick temper. 1. Eccl. 7:9 2. Prov. 22:24 B. Why? 1. Prov. 14:17 2. Prov. 14:29 D. Those who are quickly angry, quickly lose their ability to affect and influence others for good. 1. No one wants to be around someone who easily "flies off the handle." Their afraid they might get hit, hurt or blamed. 2. Prov. 15:1 3. A member of Lincoln's cabinet who frequently disagreed with him about his policies was Secretary Stanton, a man of very pronounced views. One day President Lincoln sent a message of state to Secretary Stanton by a page. On reading the message Stanton using violent language tore up the message and declared, "President Lincoln is a fool!" Returning to the President the page reported what Stanton had said. Instead of becoming angry, the President, after a moment's thought, said with a grin, "Well, perhaps Secretary Stanton is right!" Because of his greatness of soul and soft answer, Lincoln completely unarmed the man who so frequently opposed him. 4. If no one wants to be around those who are soon angry then how can such a person ever influence others to be and do good? V. Uncontrolled Tongue A. Few things will destroy one's influence than a loose tongue 1. People consider a person who cannot control their tongue foolish. 2. Eccl. 5:3 3. Those with an uncontrolled tongue include: a) Braggarts: - Prov. 27:2 b) Talebearers - Prov. 26:20-22 c) complainers - Jude 16 B. To be considered wise and spread righteous influence: 1. Let your words be few. - Prov. 10:19-20 2. Let your words be well chosen - Prov. 15:28 3. Let your words be spoken with grace - Col. 4:6 VI. Unwilling to Admit When Wrong A. A person who won't admit when they are wrong will lose their influence. 1. Note what the Scriptures say: Prov. 12:15 2. A fired Northwestern University professor was arrested for collecting his mother's social security checks for 6 years after her death. He blamed "extreme procrastination behavior" caused by depression. B. When you are wrong readily and willingly admit it and be done with it! 1. Prov. 14:16 Conclusion. A. Is your lamp lit? "But the path of the just is as the shining light, that shines more and more unto the perfect day" (Prov. 4:18). B. My Life 1. My life shall touch a dozen lives before this day is done; Leave countless marks for good or ill, ere sets the evening sun. This is the wish I always wish, the prayer I always pray: Lord, may my life help other lives it touches by the way. Source unknown C. How’s your influence. Are you leading, pointing others toward Christ? E. If you haven’t yet obeyed the gospel, you can do so today. You can begin to show a positive influence on others. F. I N V I T A T I O N